Friday, January 2nd, 2009

Time	Event
2:32p	Traveling with Mom I drove the car to Dubuque to take mom to see her brother who is 82 today. We took him some cup cakes that I picked out individually at Sentry at Hilldale. It was a nice drive over there. We have interesting discussions and there is always laughter. I love the stories of her side of the family. Back in the 1920's and early 1930's her french grandmother would buy books for them at Christmas. And holidays at our house are full of discussions and fun and we don t separate the kids from the political discussions. Case and point: Tom's son who is 12 informed me that Richard Nixon talked to paintings in the White House. And the little kids could say Blagojevich better than i could. My oldest nephew, John, who loves to argue and discuss pointed out to me when he was a teenager how much fun the discussions with my mother were. Although all my life she and i have had justice discussions. And it was the Holy Atheist who played Tracey Chapman's song that resonated so deeply that it stilled me into silence, "Hunger only for a Taste of justice cuz all that you have is your soul." Mom and I dropped off his package saw him missed my Aunt who was dealing with something on their Iowa Farm and then she and I drove through Dubuque. Hyvee is coming to Madison and that s the store all of my family shops at in Dubuque. Mom said of their new venture, "I don't know why they are going to Madison because Madison is just saturated." Last night she told me how our cousin, Jeffdoyle who is two months younger than my younger brother timed the amount of time it took this one child to eat his lunch and go back for 2nds in the mid 1980's when jeff monitored the lunch room as a senior which is what shullsburg had seniors do. Jeff timed it as 1 min and 30 seconds. I said, "that is horrible. I am going to write the new secretary of education that we should be treating lunch time as a class room." We know that nutrition is related to health directly. And instead of getting rid of home ec and health classes bring it into the lunchroom as a class. Do what Sentry at Hilldale does. Play the right music. During their busy time they play this stuff that makes you move fast and get out during their empty times they play music that makes u want to take your time and experience every aisle. I said, "I never realized it until Mike was standing in his house when they lived in Milwaukee and he said of the boys eventually going to school, 'It s going to be hard to monitor what they eat once they go to school." The new awareness of a new parent. And then right after he brought that to my attention i found Ghost's article: http://www.connectforkids.org/node/574 I told mom all of this on the way over what Mike said and then finding "the guy below's" article. And she said of Tom, "Well they tried to get the system to let them cook for the kids to just drop the stuff off there and a teacher would take a lunch each day to cook and the system wouldn t let them because if they did it for one they had to do it for all." What kind of logic is that when it comes to feeding kids crap? It has such an effect on our emotional lives. I know i am bipolar and now that i introduce green tea vitamin d3 and other good nutrition choices I am even calmer. My sister, Sheila, in her school system meets with kids to feed them breakfast in her room each morning. It's more than wooofing it down. They talk of life and she is so good at motivating kids with their life issues. Write people. Keep your sentences short. To the New Secretary Education I will simply put, "Turn Lunch time into a Class room with calm music, nutrition and conversation" Presently we teach kids how to be CONSUMERS at lunch time. So we drove home and mom pointed out the bench that my younger brother and his wife put up at Loras for my dad, her and my sister in law's parents. Mom said as we looked from the top of Loras Blvd to the view of the Mississippi, "Bub used to drop him off right at that spot each week." So that s where my brother had the bench put. She told me that "The lord must be crying in heaven over these Bishops denying people the sacraments." I need to find a Church again. I loved going to the Cathredal because it was simple ---an Irish box for a Cathedral built by the Irish. I just have to find a quiet Church to go to again. I rmemeber telling Helena back in 1990 when i was 28, "I consider the homily to be the intermission." Some of them give pathetic homilies. But the ritual, the Mass the parts that the Romans couldn t stop the Irish from bringing to the Church those are the parts of the Mass i lean on.
2:42p	This is the Church from my mother's French Side http://iagenweb.org/winneshiek/townships/smallestchurch.htm I write of my Aunt Dorothy in my book. She's the one who said, "Why if i told them what I thought they would excommunicate me." I was in 3rd grade and I found her mind to be fabulous. Years later the last time I saw her at a picnic (we have the picnics mid june each year) she looked at the rock they placed at the grave of Johann Gaertner that said, "he fought with Napolean" And with the spirit of my mother who is so French in spirit Aunt Dorothy said, "What kind of grammar is that? He fought with Napolean it sounds like they had a fist fight" Johann Gaertner was Napolean's body guard. Aunt Dorothy wrote and spoke French. She was the organist at Sacred Heart Church in Dubuque. I loved listening to her speak and she made these perfect French Christmas Cookies and last night when I handed the two cookies from Sentry at Hilldale, "I got you these because they are kind of like Aunt Dorothy's but hers werent that big." My mother's side of the family has given us lots of Math people in our family. Are my poems mathematical ???? (smile)
4:03p	We all want to know where we are from I forgot to mention that when we got back on Hwy 11 to get to Shullsburg mom said of the area between Hazel Green and Benton, "This just looks desolate." We looked at corn fields picked and waiting for spring planting. I said, "I know that feeling of desolate that's why i orginally got the Nativity Scene for the grave so it wouldn t be desolate for the family visiting it, but this year hasn t been like that for me." then, we got past the fever river and toward Shullsburg County I pointed to the hills with snow and I said, "Look this isn't desolate." She said, "This is Indian Country not farm country" I met a wait staff person at Hubbard who knew Shullsburg because her tribe was going to put a casino here at one time. And I thought at the time, "Oh, the Indians must have loved the land around Shullsburg." So my mother's declaration touched that part of me. Then, we got toward my cousin's farm Irish Acres and there were all kinds of Oak Trees. I said, "Oh, look at the Oak Trees. I like that little one it s so full of leaves." My mother said about the trees, "They look like a village don t they." I said, Yes. We drove past the rock where they were growing and my cousins' farm was right there. My mother and my father gave me a gift of knowing where i am from. In the midst of the hell with the Novice Master when I was isolated a Clarke friend said ot me, "What has happened to you? One of the things i have always admired about you is that you can go anywhere and entertain yourself." It's true. My parents taught me. I can travel anywhere without money and that is why they couldn't break me. I knew how to make soup and I knew how to travel without money. I am about to type out an e mail from my mother to her classmates. I have the privilege of reading e mails from the class of 1949. These women are fabulous. Great teachers of how to enjoy the pleasures of life. One of them wrote mom and her classmates to read "Dreams from my Father" Mom said with enthusiasm last night as she read the e mail < "oh, i want to read that." The same person recommended that they go see the new Meryl Streep movie Doubt and mom said, I want to see that too. I said, So do i, i will take you. She said, Not to that expensive theatre. (that being the Sundance theatre that Robert Redford built in Madison.) I told her, you ll love the chairs we ll go for a matinee and not eat anything. Well, my mom and i have had such a good time today. She's watching a mystery i interupted her. I wanted to save the day to teach her how to record a show and then if someone like me talks and distracts her she can pause or rewind except I didnt tell her my intention i just push the button to surprise her except i pushed the wrong button and lost her show and couldn t get back on the screen and she was flabbergasted with me that i started laughing. So she got it back to the show herself and I said, "Here let me push the right key to show you." She said, "No." I love her spirit.
11:34p	Dear Ghost I drove to madison parked by your car and found I didn t have my keys to my place because I switched cars with mom. So I rang the bell to your neighbor across from you and he was kind and let me in. I don t know his name. I see him carrying this big instrument case and i don t know if it s a cello like my mother's nephew and God son plays You ll have to scroll down after clicking on the link. http://www.osm.ca/en/index_orchestre_musiciens_fiche.cfm?ID=56 Or if the guy plays a Bass instrument. The morning after Clarke burned I was walking through the hallway of Mary Jo Hall and I heard this music coming from the orange lounge. The lounge had all kinds of orange it was hideous and we only went in there if we had no where else to go. So how could such beautiful music be coming from the ugly orange lounge. I opened the door and looked and my cousin, Peter, was playing the cello. I closed the door and stood outside to listen. How could anything be that beautiful from the ugliest lounge of the school the day after the college burned. And so life goes on, his music taught me. Tonight when I realized I'd be driving home I said, "oh well" Mom said when i got home, "Oh well" And we put in a roast that we are going to split. She and I have a such a good friendship. I wanted to watch some of my movies I had recorded. And I wanted to tell you how you were all over my dream world last night in a way that you have never been before. We were at a house and other men and women were there and I just wanted to talk to you but i had to be polite and entertain them because they were your guests and they just wouldn t leave. So i had to go and then after a long time of this dream and interaction I drove your green civic. I ended up in your green civic driving it into a parking lot where you showed up on your bike and you were there talking to someone and you saw me drive in with your green civic and you were fine with it and the part of me watching the dream couldn t believe you were fine with it. Sounds boring but it was all such an intense dream. I would have told you that through the berlin floor tonight. Oh, the stars are fitting for an Epiphany in Shullsburg tonight.

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